laughter
by Falling Tears of Death
Summary: This really wasn’t funny—then again none of it was. Hayate and the mess he left.yaoi pairings. disclamier: don't own naruto and never will


A/n: So this might be a tad experimental. All events are linear and please read and review…it's the only way writers can improve and if we don't improve we really aren't writers anymore.

Pairings: Mizuki/Iruka, Genma/Hayate, slight Genma/Radiou and Mizuki/Hayate, implied Hayate/Iruka and one sided Kakashi/Iruka

_--I'm sick, you're tired, let's dance  
Break to love make lust I know it isn't  
I'm sick, you're tired, let's dance  
Cold as numbers but let's dance  
As though it were easy for you to lead me  
I could be passive gracefully  
Half the horizon's gone for a skyline of numbers  
Half the horizon's gone we're working the numbers  
'till I'm sick  
Sleep don't pacify us until  
Daybreak sky lights up the grid we live in  
Dizzy when we talk so fast  
Fields of numbers streaming past  
I wish we were farmers, I wish we knew how  
To grow sweet potatoes and milk cows  
I wish we were lovers, but its for the best  
Tonight your ghost will ask my ghost,  
Where is the love?  
Tonight your ghost will ask my ghost,  
Who here is in line for a raise?  
Tonight your ghost will ask my ghost,  
Where is the love?  
Tonight your ghost will ask my ghost,  
Who put these bodies between us?-Metric Calculation Theme—_

"Go home and rest Hayate." It's a routine now, for Genma to speak these orders though he knows, and Hayate knows it doesn't matter. Nothing Genma says makes a difference. It's hot, too damn hot and Hayate feels stuffy, he can't stop coughing. "You still sick Hayate?" It's Mizuki, and it's a rhetorical question because lord knows the world would end before Mizuki actually cared about anything. It's too hot for this, too hot for Mizuki and his cold behavior, his patronizing questions. "Why are you here Mizuki?" Hayate is annoyed; he's not going to cover it up, what's the point. Mizuki shrugged, his silver hair moving slightly across his plain face, showing the look of mild amusement he had. "Maybe I was in the neighborhood and decided to check on you" he dragged his feet as he stepped closer, to close, and deathly close in this heat "or maybe I missed you." Hayate isn't sure how it happened, he's never sure how this happens but Mizuki is kissing him, ruthlessly. Hayate lungs are on fire, he can almost hear his heart beat slowing, he wants to struggle but its so hot, god everything is just so hot. Finally when Mizuki pulls away Hayate is gasping and coughing and choking and trying so hard to just breathe. "Didn't…didn't I…gasp…didn't I tell you not to do that anymore?" Another shrug, another amused look. "You should be happy someone wants you Hayate, half the ninjas here think you're a contagious disease the other half are waiting for you to die." Something like hate boils under Hayate's stomach but he's so tired and it's so hot. "Don't kiss me, especially after you've kissed Iruka." Finally something new, an arched eyebrow a look of surprise. Mizuki's hands are tangled in Hayate's hair, pulling him to the crook of his neck, massaging softly. "How would you know?" Hayate decides that Mizuki doesn't smell that good at all. "You tasted like ramen and apples." There is silence, what could Mizuki have said anyways. Even if he did have something to say Hayate wouldn't have been able to hear him over his own laughter. His rib cage is aching but he can't stop the sharp harsh laughs escaping his throat. Really it wasn't that funny, actually it wasn't funny at all.

--&&--

It's still too hot. Probably the hottest summer Konoha has seen in a very long time. It's not good for his cough. He's getting weaker and weaker by the day, though he won't admit this to anyone. They all already underestimate him to begin with. " Iruka!" He shouts as loud as his hoarse voice will let him and waves casually. "Hayate? Hello" Iruka slows his pace just a little, giving Hayate a chance to catch up, his skin is even darker now…yes Hayate was sure that this was the hottest Konoha has ever been. "You sound surprised to see me Iruka." He tries to smile but ends up coughing instead. "Well it's been awhile, how's your cough?" God Hayate wants to punch him hard, break his pretty little face…but he knows Iruka is actually asking because he cares, that fact only makes it worse. "Its good, keeps me company." It's supposed to be a joke, Iruka doesn't laugh. "You shouldn't keep such dangerous company." God, not the lecturing tone...he didn't come to be lectured. "This coming from a ninja? Anyways I hear the Uzamaki boy will be in the exams. I'll keep a special watch out for him." He wants to sound smooth, nonchalant, but god his damn cough. Iruka smiled, truly smiled and said thank you and then turned to walk the other direction. "Iruka! Catch" As a red ball of speed came flying towards his face Iruka reflexively caught the object, slightly confused. "Open your hand Iruka." And he did, his surprisingly smooth hands opened and there was an apple. "Hayate…I…how did you know I love apples?" Hayate smiled, god what could someone like Iruka see in Mizuki?

--&&--

He couldn't sleep. His cough was just getting worse and the heat was only increasing. He felt so weak and sick and he hated it. He couldn't even breathe. Every time he'd try to take in air he'd just cough and cough and cough and cough. It's never been this bad before. It's like drowning on air. He feels like he's about to pass out and then….and then a shadow in his room. Hayate would have jumped up in surprise had he not been a trained ninja. Instead he gasps…hungrily sucking in air while quickly grabbing a shuriken just in time to see Kakashi's bored face staring down at him. " Ka…gasp…Ka gasp." Kakashi nods as if he's said anything of importance. "I couldn't sleep; I could hear your coughing a mile away. I knew you were awake. Anyways I have a gift for you." Hayate doesn't trust his voice so he holds out his hand. " Here" a toss " they are honey milk drops. It'll help your throat." Hayate's hands are shaking as he unwraps the small candies and pops it into his mouth. He almost wants to cry from the relief he feels. "Thank you." A nod. "So, I saw you with Iruka." He almost chokes. "O, Ok." It's not the best response but really what else could he say?

--&&--

Sometimes being with just Genma was good. Other times like now it was better than good; it made life worth living. It's hot and Hayate is sucking on a honey milk drop and standing unnecessarily close to Genma.—but who cares? "Hayate you look horrible, when are you finally going to start taking care of yourself?" Hayate shrugs and leans off the wall to turn and face Genma. "What does it matter? We are ninja, we die and then our name gets put on a stone. It's our reality Genma." Its awkward but good to look at him like this, Hayate feels he could stare at Genma's face all day. "When you die you leave behind the people who care about you. Look at Kakashi he goes to that stone every damn day." And then Hayate smiled a real smile and Genma felt like he would give the world to always see him look that way. Hayate bumped their foreheads together and leaned in as if to kiss Genma, he spoke in a whispered tone "Yeah, but honestly who is vouching for Kakashi's sanity?" It was a joke, but Genma couldn't seem to find his laughter. It felt good, even in the unbearable heat to have Hayate's head nestled in the crook of his neck. It felt better than a lot of things he could have been doing right now. "God Genma, I feel so tired. It's so hot. I feel like I'm dying." Genma chuckled, it wasn't funny but what else could he do?

--&&--

These past few weeks have been getting better. His coughs aren't as bad and he's not as tired, despite the increasing heat. Hayate could almost swear Kohona was the hottest place on the planet. And then there was Genma. Even the thought of him made Hayate smile. But so did Iruka, Hayate isn't sure how to feel about that. It just felt so good to breathe again. And then he coughed and he coughed and he coughed. When he was finished there was blood.

--&&--

"You know Hayate, I think you've just made your record." Hayate looked up from his position on the floor with Genma. " What record are you speaking of?" Genma is brushing strands of hair off Hayate's young face, sweeping his thumb on the bags under his eyes. " You haven't coughed for 5 minutes." Genma smiled and Hayate felt his heart breaking. " You know what this means Hayate? You're finally getting better." And then Hayate coughed and coughed and coughed and coughed. When Genma looked there was a blood spot by the place Hayate was laying his head. "Look what you did Genma. You jinxed it." Hayate laughed and Genma chuckled. It wasn't funny, but it hurt too much to admit that.

--&&--

Genma laid on the floor unmoving. His body frozen with remorse and then there was a knock on the door. "Genma, its Radiou, I'm coming in." Of all the people Genma didn't want to see it was Radiou. Of all the people he could handle seeing it was Radiou. Genma sat up and crossed his legs as Radiou sat down in front of him. "So I guess you've heard about Hayate. And how you're replacing him as my partner right." His voice is strained and Genma knows this is hurting him too. He was sure Radiou had some kind of relationship with Hayate, but unlike Iruka, Radiou didn't cross the line. Yes he knew about Iruka, how couldn't he…sometimes when they kissed, if they kissed—Hayate tasted like ramen and apples. Genma nods and leans forward, pressing his face onto Radiou's shoulder. He's not sure why this is happening or why Radiou is rubbing his back in circles and brushing his lips against any accessible skin. But it's happening. And when Radiou kisses him its just different. Not good or bad just different. And then he stands up and looks down at Genma, "I'm not him, Genma. I can't be." Genma doesn't say anything; he doesn't have anything to say. Nothing he could say would change anything, so really what's the point?

--&&--

As Radiou begins walking out Iruka walks in and Genma decides Iruka really is the last person on earth he wants to see right now. "Mizuki is a traitor." His voice is low defeated, his hair is down and he can't even look Genma in the damn face. He's a child playing in a mans world and right now more than ever he doesn't fit in. Radiou turns and smiles a huge smile, " Come now Iruka, he's always been one and that's the truth." As Radiou walks out Genma feels his heartbreaking…god that smile. He wants to sleep, to die, anything to get away from this heat and most importantly Iruka who is moving to close. Too close for the heat and deathly close considering the situation. " Genma I never meant, I mean I didn't…He…I…sigh…Do you hate me?" Genma is tired so damn tired. God its hot. " No" he could say more, would say more but its hot and no is a good enough answer, everything considered. " Are you sure Genma?" He's leaning closer, too close and god with his hair down like that it was so easy…too easy. "Yes, today." With that Genma pulls him roughly and smashes their lips together. He kisses and kisses even when Iruka tries to pull back. Iruka tastes like him or more appropriately Hayate tasted like Iruka. His lungs are thundering and his heart beat is loud in his ears, he feels like he's drowning and it hurts so good, Genma wonders if Hayate felt this way every time he coughed. Finally he let Iruka go and began gasping and choking and coughing. Iruka stared with an unreadable expression, Genma figured he was either scared or confused, "I'm not Hayate, you can't pretend that I am. It's not fair." Genma smiled but his face showed no happiness. He pulled Iruka until their foreheads were touching and rasped against his ear "you know the question you just asked. I changed my mind. I hate you Iruka. I really do." Iruka sat silently, what could he say? Well actually Iruka could have said something but Genma wouldn't have heard him over his own laughter. This really wasn't funny—then again none of it was.

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